Managing Your Home and Time Wisely

My Dear Lissy,
Another storm has gone, and we're digging out from about 15" of snow.  We're expecting two more storm systems in the next week, so we'll be getting plenty of exercise!  We're looking forward to dinner with friends and then a missionary speaker from Israel at church tonight.

I wanted to share my philosophy of home management with you today.   Home management in my mind occurs in three dimensions.
2-D management is how you plan your days and work on paper.
3-D management is how you organize your physical space and belongings.
4-D management is how you utilize your time and energy.
These three interlock to create a system of checks and balances so that our home runs smoothly.

The basis of 2-D management is a set of tools that includes a calendar (virtual or paper), a tickler, a weekly plan, and a scheduled to-do list  These require very little discipline or time to create and maintain -- literally minutes a day.  Without them, life becomes  helter-skelter.  The bigger and busier your family, the more you'll depend on each of these tools.  When they are faithfully used, they free up a great deal of time, save substantial amounts of money, and allow you to serve and bless your husband, family, and community.

The basis of 3-D management is the acronym S.P.A.C.E. created by Julie Morgenstern.  SPACE (Sort, Purge, Assign a Home, Containerize, Equalize) describes the process of keeping our belongings from overwhelming our homes and lives with clutter.  There is a great deal of discipline, work, and time required to keep your belongings thinned out and in their proper place.  The rewards are time and tranquility, both of which are of great value to our family, as well as the opportunity to bless other families who may have a genuine need for an item that we no longer wear or use.

The basis of 4-D management is routines and that scheduled to-do list.  Routines are lists of tasks that you implement every day or week at about the same time.  While they take discipline to implement, they require very little effort to maintain.   A to-do list should contain one-time tasks (or tasks that repeat very infrequently).  I know a few diligent homemakers who because of their discipline and motivation at the 3-D and 4-D level are able to devote time to providing additional income or ministry opportunities for their families, just as the virtuous woman did in Proverbs 31.

A homemaker is much like a clock.  A clock has dozens of gears spinning in all directions simply to keep the two hands moving in a prescribed rhythm day after day, year after year.  Our families, our communities, our entire society rely heavily on that structure.  Even in places where there is no man-made clock, God has set the sun, moon, and stars to determine the rhythms of life.  God has given us the task of managing our homes under our husband's loving leadership.  We are to provide the structure and order that allows our family to live lives that are glorifying to God.  It is an awesome responsibility, but can often seem (when our faith is small) that we are simply "going around in circles".

Once again I've used up my time.  I have so much I want to share with you!  I'll try to expand on these thoughts in the days and weeks ahead and link those letters back to this one when appropriate.

I love you just because you're you,
Momma

Jesus first, Jesus only, Jesus always

My dearest Liss,
     If I could write just one letter to future you, it would be this one.  Jesus was the door to your salvation many, many years ago on that April morning.  He alone is the strength, the truth, the way to live the Christian life -- your sanctification now.  Jesus, not Heaven, not rest from labors, not even a reunion with our dear ones who have passed before us, is our reward.

     I struggled for many years with Phil 1:21 - "For to me to live is Christ, but to die is gain".   Wasn't it gain to be working for the Lord here on earth, bringing souls into the kingdom, encouraging the saints?  Wouldn't death bring me into the presence of Jesus?  The verse seemed backwards to how I was actually living!

     And then I hit a rock wall when I was 36 years old.  I simply didn't have enough love, enough strength, enough something to continue doing everything I was being asked to do.  I learned during that time that His yoke is indeed easy, and His burden is light.  I had to stop trying so hard and instead run to Jesus and ask for His love and strength for what He had called me to that day.
 
     And he gave grace!
       He gave the grace to say "I can't" and ask for help.
       He gave the grace to assist Grammy Bea as her Alzheimer's spun out of control
       He gave the grace to take care of my home, a toddler, two home-schoolers, and a cub scout den all in the same day.
       He gave grace -- divine help.  It was Him, not me.  It was Him through me.

     I want you to know that when interpersonal conflict is threatening your peace, you don't try harder, you lay it at His feet.  Let Him anoint the pain with His love, and fill you with His love for them.
  
     I want you to learn to take your agenda for the day before Him each morning and ask for His wisdom and grace to accomplish all in His strength.

     I want you to see that any pain you face --
       the long, lonely evenings as a single lady,
       the aching heart when you can't bear a child, or you've lost one,
       the rawness in your soul when you're parenting toddlers,
       the impossible agenda during the school years,
       the gaping void as family and friends move away and pass on
       the numbness and disappointment when you've failed Him yet again --
       He longs to help.  He wants to strengthen and keep you.  You'll never see perfection, but as the years go by, you'll be able to trace the progress He has made in conforming you to His image.  You'll trace his hand of love and mercy in your life.

   I'll write letters to you in the coming days and weeks on how to establish and strengthen your relationship with Jesus Christ.  The principles are not difficult to comprehend, but they are exceedingly difficult to apprehend.   We want a to-do list:  have devotions, faithfully attend church, pray, witness.  But a relationship with Him demands far more:  trust, obedience, submission, surrender, and above all, grace.  


As much as I love you, He loves you far more,
Momma

And so it begins

My Dear Lissy-Lu,
Many years ago women spent hours recording every detail of their housekeeping so their daughters would have access to their hard-earned wisdom once they moved away from home.  From favorite family recipes to first aid for chickens, nothing was left out.
It has been my desire for many years to compile a book for you.  You won't need or want to do everything the way I do, and sometimes calling for advice is just the excuse you need to enjoy a quiet conversation and unburden your heart a bit.  But for the days when you need a recipe, or wonder how I did something, or maybe why I did what I did, I hope these letters will come in handy.
You're just a bitty little thing right now.  You turned 8 on Sunday.  Do you remember your favorite gifts?  How you set up a tea party for your dolls with the beautiful china set the Scearbos gave you?  Carving a bar of Ivory soap into a little apple with your first pocket knife? You love to be busy, you love beautiful things, and you have a tender, happy disposition.  I hope all of those qualities will follow you into womanhood and serve you well as you build a home.

I love you to the moon (and back),
Momma